>I want you to think about what empathy really means beyond the surface level.
Empathy is caring for your fellow person and internalizing that to advance causes that benefit us all.
But empathy can fall into the paradox of tolerance as well. You can't empathize with the orange man who wants to see you out of the country and your kid on an island. Anyone who is a drag on the cause can't be carried, because their mindset is to drag you backwards, if not outright eliminate you.
Those are the two aspects I balance in my mind. I try to give basic respect to anyone I meet and run into, but there are some individuals you need to cut out if you want to achieve your goals.
>I want people to stop doing the thing where they only empathize with the person most like them and instead try to feel what it's like to be like the person who is least like them.
Sure. Already doing it. If anything I probably relate a lot more to Karen. miserable office job I hate making not enough money and stuck in a horrible system with little advancement, and increasingly little control over my life. Outside of "we like tech" and "we met annoying people", I probably don't relate much with the author.
The only difference between me and karen is that I've learned to hold my tongue and not take my frustrations out on others. It kind of helps when the clients are children; there's no optics win for yelling at a kid for me. The kids will simply double down or break down, boss will reprimand me, the parents will reprimand me. If that's my consequences for these actions, what's there to empathize here with Karen?
I'm not mad "at" Karen. I'm mad at the wider system that creates Karens as they are put in, chewed, and spit out. I do want better for all of us, but I also don't have the professional capacity to help people like Karen along the way. Odds are they will also actively drag the cause for all of us down. I can't save everyone.
Empathy is caring for your fellow person and internalizing that to advance causes that benefit us all.
But empathy can fall into the paradox of tolerance as well. You can't empathize with the orange man who wants to see you out of the country and your kid on an island. Anyone who is a drag on the cause can't be carried, because their mindset is to drag you backwards, if not outright eliminate you.
Those are the two aspects I balance in my mind. I try to give basic respect to anyone I meet and run into, but there are some individuals you need to cut out if you want to achieve your goals.
>I want people to stop doing the thing where they only empathize with the person most like them and instead try to feel what it's like to be like the person who is least like them.
Sure. Already doing it. If anything I probably relate a lot more to Karen. miserable office job I hate making not enough money and stuck in a horrible system with little advancement, and increasingly little control over my life. Outside of "we like tech" and "we met annoying people", I probably don't relate much with the author.
The only difference between me and karen is that I've learned to hold my tongue and not take my frustrations out on others. It kind of helps when the clients are children; there's no optics win for yelling at a kid for me. The kids will simply double down or break down, boss will reprimand me, the parents will reprimand me. If that's my consequences for these actions, what's there to empathize here with Karen?
I'm not mad "at" Karen. I'm mad at the wider system that creates Karens as they are put in, chewed, and spit out. I do want better for all of us, but I also don't have the professional capacity to help people like Karen along the way. Odds are they will also actively drag the cause for all of us down. I can't save everyone.